Ghost Light (ghost_light) wrote,
Ghost Light

Over 30's memory

I just finished an amazing book where (not to give too many spoilers) a woman was confronted
by someone in her past and shown how things were "supposed" to have happened - the lives that were supposed to have been lived based on the choice she didn't make but fate had intended.

This got me thinking about some of those "what ifs" that begin to pop up as we get older. Those moments that we look back on and realize that's really where a divergence between where we are and where we could be occurred. I'm realizing one of mine was just as I was graduating from college. The year before I stage managed my first show for a guest director (the first time that opportunity was ever given to anyone in the department and I still wonder what the head saw in me to have tapped me for the job). The director ran a theatre company in San Francisco and we exchanged phone numbers after the show so I could let him know if I was ever in the Bay Area. I called once to ask for a recommendation and he almost crawled through the phone because he thought I was in town and we would get to visit.

As I was getting ready to graduate, I sort of lined up some of the things I could do, which included calling him and seeing if there was a place for me at his theatre. I didn't. I was more interested in acting at the time and I wasn't sure about moving to a city I'd never seen in my life. Now that I have finally discovered what I want to be - a stage manager - I look at that moment and ponder what life could have been. Could I have been living and working in theatre in San Francisco in the early 90's instead of working for a retail chain in Seattle? Would I be there now and settled in a stage manager position instead of bouncing from theatre to theatre in search of a paying position in Alaska?

What are your moments that haunt or titillate you?
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